Gordon Lightfoot, Boss Man
Got up fairly late today. Went to brunch. Yee hah. Then I went home for a bit and dropped off my laundry. Came back, and took a bit of a nap. Then Alice and Chris (D.) (who, by the way, did not sleep over last night, Alice was just lying funny. Gods only know about tonight though. He's still over. Dammit, I have enough trouble sleeping with just one other person in the room.) talked me into driving them to Fred Meyer's. This somehow morphed into us all spending an hour buying cleaning supplies so Alice and I can clean our heater. Yay. So I was out an hour of time and around nine bucks. Great.
Then I once again tried to take a nap, but Chris (P.) came by to talk to me. Eventually I got him to leave, actually slept for a bit this time, (although the roommate came in and turned on the light a few times) then Jesse came by to wake me up and ask me to drive him to the video store. There are times when having a car really sucks. Anyway. So I drove him to the video store and he rented The Birdcage. Then I drove him back to campus and drove myself to Wendy's for dinner.
After dinner, I went to the library to look up a newspaper from the day I was born for a speech I have to give in comm class on Tuesday. Yee hah. It wasn't that bad, actually. I'm pretty good with getting machines to work, so it didn't take long.
Came back to the dorms and hung out with people for a while. Then Jesse, Chris (P.), Rose, Chloe and I all went down to Miller to watch the movie. I'd seen it before, but I still really like it. It was good to laugh.
Oh, I also read through a bunch of my old journal entries from around August today. It was kind of depressing. It's almost six months later and I'm still thinking about Sean. Urk. It's changed in some ways, but it's still the basic problem of me sitting here caring about him way more than he cares about me, and the impossibility of us ever dating. I mean, I know he at least thinks about me sometimes, he reads this journal fairly regularly I believe and I see him online, but I don't think he spends half as much time thinking about me as I do thinking about him. I really need to stop thinking about him, but my thoughts drift to him so easily that it's just not funny. When I get in some moods, every little thing can remind me of him.
It also doesn't help that I'm working through some issues about Ian. That whatever-it-was kind of spun me around, and I have to get my bearings again. Everything happened so fast, at least by my standards. The first night I ever met him, we got about as far as I let Jordan get the first year. Possibly further. I let him sleep over that same week. I'd never done that before at all. Well, Chris (C.) and I had both crashed on the hide-a-bed beofre, but that's completely different because we totally don't see each other in that fashion and it was very much two people crashing on opposite sides of a fairly large bed. It was a bit different with Ian. Ok, fine, it was very bloody different with Ian. I had several "firsts" with Ian, actaully. Not that any of them really matter that much, I suppose. But the whole thing was just a whirlwind. It was my first real attempt at dating someone without our parents watching our every move. Also my first attempt at anything other that what was, essentially, a long-distance relationship. So it was on a completely different timeline than I knew how to cope with. And then, just when I was starting to figure things out, whatever-it-was ended. That really hurt. I'm still sorting through everything, trying to figure out why I liked some things that I liked, why I did some things I did, why so many things were the way they were and are the way they are.
So my brain is just all around a fun place to be, oh yes. *sigh*. I should just go join some obscure religious order, I'm not cut out for reality. Especially the dating portion thereof. Urk.
In the meantime, it looks like the roommate and the roommate's boyfriend have gone to sleep for the night, and I suppose that means that I should too. *sigh*. I want my own room.
Captain Squanky signing off